Peer, not parent.

Peer, not parent

We write like a friend who has done the reading, sitting next to you — not a teacher, a doctor or a brand. Second person, plain words, short sentences. We say what a colour meant and where it came from. We never tell you what you are.

Exploration is the point, not the answer

A colour is something to hold for a minute and see how it feels. Nobody has to land anywhere. We never use “phase”, “confused”, “just”, “really” or “lifestyle” about a person’s identity, and we never imply an identity is a choice, a trend, a diagnosis or a destination.

Say the word the person uses

Gay, lesbian, bi, pan, ace, aro, trans, non-binary, genderfluid, queer, questioning — in the person’s own words, as the Stonewall list of terms sets them out. “Sexual orientation”, never “sexual preference”. “Trans woman / trans man / non-binary person” — the noun is the person. No slurs, ever, including reclaimed ones, unless quoting a historical source with the source shown.

No acts on the public domain

Sexual acts, kink practices and the mature 1970s wording live on the archive, behind the 18+ gate, with rating=adult. On hankyfamily.com the code is colour, pocket and identity. This is what keeps a sixteen-year-old safe on the site and keeps us outside the Online Safety Act’s pornography duties and inside TikTok Shop’s rules.

No medical, no legal, no advice

We do not describe hormones, surgery, binding, tucking, transition steps, medication or any clinical pathway, and we do not tell anyone what to do about school, home, faith or work. We signpost: the Support page (Switchboard LGBT+, The Proud Trust, akt, Childline, Mermaids, Stonewall) is one link from every identity page. If someone is in danger, 999.

Never sell to a child

CAP Code rule 5.4.2: no direct appeal to children to buy. On identity pages the art is present but the call to action is “find your code”, never “buy now”. Prices sit on the collection and code pages, in the studio voice, for adults. We never exploit credulity, loyalty, vulnerability or inexperience (CAP 5.2).

Data like a guest, not a host

The quiz stores nothing. Email is asked for after the reveal, once, with one line saying what it’s for, no pre-ticked box, no countdown, no “only 3 left” (ICO Children’s Code: data minimisation, nudge techniques, high-privacy defaults). No age is asked on the public site; the archive asks for an 18+ statement and remembers it only for the session.

The history is theirs; we cite

Every historical claim carries its source — Fischer 1977, Damron 1980, Townsend 1983, Stryker & Van Buskirk 1996, Jones 2017, the Leather Archives & Museum, Bishopsgate, the GLBT Historical Society. We say plainly that the code was built by gay and bisexual men in leather bars, that it belongs to them, and that our prints are a specification of the record, not a claim on it.

The voice is disclosed

The Hankyfamily on our channels is an AI-generated art construct and says so. It has no lived experience and never claims any. It can tell you what a colour means; it cannot tell you who you are. A person at the studio handles money, complaints and anything that needs a human.

The visual code speaks first

Colour, position, word, figure — in that order. Left gives, right receives. The figure carries the colour (Rule 17). No rainbow-gradient decoration, no stock photography, no emoji, no faces. The print is the picture on every page and every share card. If a page needs an image that isn’t a print, it doesn’t need an image.